DD was doing great during her twenty two months. She could easily kick a big ball forward without falling. She didn’t have problems in turning corners when running around the living room.

She was delight in using her ever-more-dexterous fingers to build a tower of eight cubes, and opened my zipped purse with no problem. She could wash and dry her hands, after a messy playing with the water.

Unlike a typical 22-month-old whose vocabulary consists of about 20 words, DD could say a few Chinese words and a couple of English words. This month she added daddy (English) and yeye (grandpa in Chinese) into her vocabulary. But she understood many more words than she could pronounce—she could identify a number of pictures by pointing. And she understood and followed a two-step oral command, unwillingly sometimes.

She continued to show affection to her teddy bear, little dolly, and toys. She also freely kissed and hugged us, though sometimes rejected to give M hugs and kisses when she didn’t get her way. Overall, she was a kind, loving and sweet little one.

Different languages to mommy and daddy
This month DD added daddy (English) and yeye (grandpa in Chinese) into her vocabulary (see Baby’s growth, month 21). She was happy to recognize that it made us happy when she called. And she used different languages for me and M.

To me, she said mama, clearly in Chinese pronunciation (see How to say mom, dad and baby in Chinese?). To M, she said daddy, without any double in English.

Since I always labeled myself as mama, mommy in Chinese, it was understandable that she called me in Chinese. Interesting it is that I always referred M as baba, daddy in Chinese, but DD always called M daddy rather than baba.

Probably it was because M always labeled himself as daddy, in English, to her.   

Obviously, at this stage, listening skills are essential to language development. Since DD heard M naming himself as daddy a lot of times, she remembered and associated daddy with M.

It explained why DD referred Grandma and Grandpa as nainai and yeye, grandma and grandpa in Chinese (see How to say grandma and grandpa in Chinese?), rather than grandma and grandpa in English—because they didn’t have so many opportunities to refer themselves to her in English. 

For-parents-only temper tantrums
DD behaved beautifully in the public. She was sweet, cute, and always smiling. But at home, she was a baby terminator. And even worse, she began to show some hallmark behaviors of “terrible two”: she insisted on doing exactly what I had told her not to do, or asked for something and threw it to the floor instantly when I handed it to her, or throw herself down on the floor in a fit of temper if she didn’t get her way.

According to Heidi Murkoff’s What to Expect the Toddler Years , it isn’t possible to vanquish tantrums altogether, it is often possible to moderate or minimize them. Here are some approaches that we did with DD.

• Keep cool, although it is hard to do sometimes. According to Heidi Murkoff’s What to Expect the Toddler Years , nothing fuels a toddler’s fire like a fired-up parent. And a parental blow-up can also terrify a toddler, raising the specter of loss of parental love. I joked with M that we need to practice our zen with DD.  

• Express empathy. Sometimes a hug and a shoulder to cry on are all that toddlers need to feel better. When DD was crying on about something she couldn’t have, M said, “I am sorry that you cannot always get what you want. But you know what; this is the life you have to learn to adapt. Even mommy and daddy cannot always get things we want.”

• Try distraction. Sometimes M cajoled DD out of a tantrum by giving her a mission to achieve, a chore to do, a book to read, or watching TV for few minutes. Sometimes M responded to DD’s tantrum with humor or even silliness. When DD stubbornly refused to brush her teeth and turned her back against M, M would tickle her bottom with the toothbrush and said “shall we brush your bottom today?”

• Ignore the tantrum. Heidi Murkoff said in her book What to Expect the Toddler Years , “often the best course of action is no action at all”. True. When we tried all other ways and DD still kept throwing a fit, we simple walked away from the scenario and let herself cool off. Soon when she fount out there was no audience, she quickly came back to us and regained her composure.

If I am not happy, I will call you “nainai”.
DD was a child born with a sense of humor. At 22 month, she knew how to tease us. 

This month DD added daddy (English) into her vocabulary. She was happy to find out that it made us happy when she called. Of course, we were very pleased to hear her calling us mama and daddy.

One evening, after supper, I asked DD, “who am I?”

“Mama”, she said.

“Who am I?”M didn’t want to miss a single opportunity to be called. 

DD looked at him, smiling. You could see the twinkling in her eyes…

“yeye”, she said.

“I am not Grandpa.” M complained.

DD laughed. And so did I.

“You know who I am”, M touched her little cute nose, “you are just teasing me.”

Later at that night, I asked DD to climb up to the changing table (did I mention she could climb on to her changing table? Yes, she could) and I would change her diaper. She knew what will come next—going to bed, so she tried all kinds of tricks to postpone.

Finally, I got tired of her tricks. I lifted her up and placed her onto the changing table. She moaned and she groaned. 

Suddenly, she pointed to me and said “nainai” (grandma in Chinese, see How to say grandma and grandpa in Chinese?). This time, M burst into laughing.

Obviously, she knew the power of her words.

Still not potty trained….
According to Heidi Murkoff’s What to Expect the Toddler Years , toilet learning is best and most efficiently accomplished when the child—not his parents—is ready. And forcing the issue is one sure way to fail.

So true! I learned this lesson via my personal experience.

Since DD was getting close to her two year birthday, I was concerned she would never learn to potty, if we didn’t push the issue a little bit.

Therefore, we went to Baby R Us and bought a cute potty for her.

At the first night, she was excited about her new toy. She climbed it up and down, trying to figure out how to land her bottom perfectly. She took it with her wherever she went, to her bedroom, to our living room and to the kitchen. Finally she decided it worked the best in the TV room as a chair with back support. 

We showed her how to take off her pants and sit onto it with bare bottom. We explained to her the purpose of the potty as we pretended to have a bowl movement and had some fake growling. She listened and nodded. Everything looked fine.

The next morning, after breakfast, I asked her, “do you want to use the potty?”, since I knew she always had a bowl movement at this time.

She looked at me, hesitated.

“Let’s go potty.” I suggested. I took her to the bathroom, took off her pants, and let her sit on the training toilet.

She looked at me, puzzled.

I showed her some fake growling, and said “Remember the toilet training we practiced yesterday? Now you can do it.”

She looked at me, now knowing what to do.

Suddenly, she burst into crying.

“Do you want to get up?” I asked her.

She shook her head, but continued crying.

“What is wrong?” I asked her.

She didn’t answer.

“Do you want to get up?” I asked again.

She kept shaking her head, but she was still crying.

I took her off the potty, put pants back on her and held her in my arms.

After a while, she calmed down.

But after that, she shook her head firmly every time I asked whether she wanted to use the potty.

It was a mistake. I pressured her to relinquish her diapers prematurely. Now I had to accept my “punishment”—she only wanted me to change her diapers since then!

Related posts:
Baby’s growth, month 21
Baby’s growth, month 20
Baby’s growth, month 19
Baby’s growth, month 18
Baby’s growth, month 17
Baby’s growth, month 16
Baby’s growth, month 15
Baby’s growth, month 14
Baby’s growth, month 13
Baby’s growth, month 12
Baby’s growth, month 11
Baby’s growth, month 10
Baby’s growth, month 9
Baby’s growth, month 8
Baby’s growth, month 7
Baby’s growth, month 6
Baby’s growth, month 5
Baby’s growth, month 4
Baby’s growth, month 3
Baby’s growth, month 2
Baby’s growth, month 1

Tags: Baby Growth | Baby's Growth, From Lina, Second Year | Lina | May 3, 2010 2:06 pm | Comments (4)